My life has always been extremely busy. I have constantly been running at 250%. As long as I can remember. Even in Kindergarden. And always it is my deep belief that things will settle down as soon as I get “this” or “that” done. That I will be able to relax then. But it never happened, because … well because I always found new things I wanted to do right away, new ideas to test. It has always been ike this and I cannot imagine my life any other way. Even though I need some contrast program once in a while.
Just the other day in November (dang … 4 months ago already!) I decided to eliminate a whole branch of stuff I was doing to have more time for my photography work. It was a simple matter of opportunity costs and I was so happy with this decision! Finally, I thought, I would have enough time do do one ADDITIONAL project. Ha! That night I had the idea for 3 further projects which I am just dying to do right away. Three, not one. And I just could not decide on which one to do first. It just seemed too damn hard to postpone the other two. Do you agree with me that my mind likes to play games on me?
And then I got sick.
My doctors were just soooooooo sure that I was totally overworked, close to a burn out, or that maybe I had a burn out already that … well, they just did not think to check my thyroid gland, which had simply gradually given up. To be sincere, I think I have been fighting this loss for a much longer time, but I am a disciplined person and I got used to fight the symptoms. It became normal. Until I had no energy left. That was right after the BURNparty last December. And then I went to sleep. For 3 months.
Now things are fine. Kudos to the doctor who diagnosed me right – this actually runs in my family, as I found out – and kudos to the modern medicine, who offers me the hormones, that my dearest gland does not want to produce anymore, in a synthetic form. I am really glad I do not live in the middle ages! So I am up in the game again, planning to surpass my 100th birthday working as I am now. Of course I am sketching out all the the projects mentioned above, to start them now (do not tell anyone, but I have already started). I even picked up 3 old projects to give them an additonal twist and take them further. After 3 months of sleeping aimlessly around, I am desperately UNDERworked!!!
Why the pic above? I am taking a liking to working in cafés, restaurants and places in general where there are a lot of people. I am totally enjoying the fuzzing and buzzing … it thrills me, gives me new ideas. Strange really, because up to last December, I needed complete quietness to work on concepts – I could not concentrate otherwise. Funny how things change. Oh well … So the above pic was taken on my last night out. I went to a very nice Chinese restaurant around the corner. Guess what I had for dinner? :)
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